You Made Good Money Last Year, So Why Does Debt Keep Winning?
You Made Good Money Last Year, So Why Does Debt Keep Winning?
If you took a look at your tax return that you just filed and your jaw dropped, not because the number was bad, but because it was really good, and then you looked at your bank account and your credit card balance and something in you just sank because you cannot figure out where it all went...
You made good money, and yet every month still feels like a squeeze. The $600 car payment comes out. The credit card minimum hits. And you're left wondering, am I ever going to actually feel like I'm winning with the hard-earned money I'm making?
My friend, I have been exactly where you are. So today I want to have a real conversation with you. Not a shaming one, but a big-sister one. Because I want you to get a little angry — not at yourself, but at your debt. And there is a big difference.
In the last few months, my business profits have been lower than usual. Not drastically, but enough to notice, and enough that I had to make certain investments in the business. I'll be honest, it stressed me out, that familiar knot in your stomach.
But here's what happened. When I sat down and looked at our personal budget, I came back to it with so much peace, because we had margin. I didn't have to bring in what I typically bring in. We were still able to give. We were still able to invest. I bought a few things I'd been putting off. We survived the chaos of "May-cember." My husband is even going on a fully funded, once-in-a-lifetime golf trip. And we did all of that in a month where I made less.
Do you want to know the secret? It's because we don't have debt payments eating our income alive.
You Can Wander Into Debt, But You Cannot Wander Out
Dave Ramsey says something I could never get out of my head: you can wander your way into debt, but you cannot wander your way out. And my friend, that is so true. Nobody sits down one day and says, I'm going to go $30,000 into debt on purpose. There was a car payment here, a credit card there, a medical bill you put off, and you just kind of wandered in. But wandering out is not a thing. Getting out of debt requires a decision. It requires commitment and dedication.
Here's an analogy I want you to hold onto. Debt is like a slow leak in your tire. You can still drive. You might not even notice it at first. But every single mile, you're losing air. Until one day you're stuck on the side of the road wondering how you got there, when really, the leak had been draining you the whole time.
My husband and I paid off a significant amount of debt in 10 months. It was 10 months of devotion, 10 months of saying no to things we didn't need, 10 months of it being really hard and uncomfortable. But nearly eight years on the other side of that, we have not had lasting money stress since. I'm human, so it's not like stress never comes up — but it's short-lived and it passes. It's not hanging over our heads. And it's not because we make a crazy income. It's because we have no payments competing for our priorities.
A Real, Tactical Plan
I don't want to just rile you up and send you home. I want to leave you with something to actually do.
1. Get angry at the right thing.
According to debt.org, 53% of people ages 30 to 44 carry a balance on their credit cards. That's over half. So all the people who tell me "oh, I have a credit card but I pay it off every month" — half of them are probably not being fully honest with themselves. And here's the part that should make you furious: credit cards are charging north of 29% interest right now. That means for every thousand dollars you carry on a credit card, you are handing the bank almost $300 a year just to hold your balance. That is money leaving your family going to absolutely nothing for you. Get mad at that — not at yourself for getting into debt, but at the debt itself. And then do something about it.
2. Know your number.
Pull up every debt you have. Write down the balance, the minimum payment, and the interest rate for each one. You need to see the full picture, because you cannot fight what you can't see. Most women I work with have never actually looked at the total. It's uncomfortable, but it's so clarifying. And if this is your first time doing this, you're probably not going to get it 100% right the first pass — things will sneak up on you. That's okay. See it as your starting point and rip off the bandaid. No one else can do this for you.
3. Cut off what's feeding the problem.
What's adding to your debt? I want to get real with you here, because I've been there too. Social media is making us spend money we don't have on things we don't need. We haven't had a credit card in years, so I haven't gone into debt over this specifically — but I have bought plenty of things I didn't need and honestly regret, purely from emotional spending or being convinced by someone else's content online. Keeping up with the Joneses used to mean your neighbor across the street. Now it's at our fingertips, scrolling until we fall asleep. You have permission to mute the accounts that make you want to spend, or get off the app entirely if you need to. Your peace is worth more than staying in the loop.
4. Find your people.
There are debt-free communities, accountability groups, people sharing their real-time payoff journeys and posting their wins. Follow them instead. Get plugged into a church program like Financial Peace University, or a book club around personal finance. Whatever it is, surround yourself with people who motivate you in the right direction.
5. Make the decision.
Draw a line in the sand and say, I am not living like this anymore. You can't wander out of debt — you have to decide to get out. Pick a method, either the debt snowball or the debt avalanche, and commit to it. So many people wait for the perfect moment to start. There is no perfect moment. The perfect moment is you, starting today, with whatever you have.
A Quick Story to Encourage You
I have a client whose husband and wife are finally combining their finances for the first time in their marriage, after a handful of years together. They had some savings started for a potential house, but we decided they'd pay off their credit card debt first. I laid out their whole payoff plan and told them they could be out of credit card debt by October — if they used most of that savings toward debt instead, leaving just a small emergency cushion.
They were nervous to touch the savings, so I told them to just start with $2,000 this month. Then $2,000 the next. She texted me recently saying she cannot believe the momentum and excitement they're feeling now. And it wouldn't have happened if they hadn't just started.
So this is me motivating you the same way. Just start with what you have.
The Bottom Line
You make good money, and you deserve to actually feel it — not just see it on a tax return and wonder where it disappeared to. Debt isn't your identity. It's a math problem with a solution, and you are more than capable of solving it. But you have to decide. You have to take responsibility. And you have to do something about it today.
Things don't ever calm down on their own. You have to calm down. You have to take a deep breath, slow down to speed up, and realize where you're at. And when your money has a plan, you have peace.
Feeling financially tight is not a character flaw and it is not a faith issue. It's a structure issue — and sometimes just a seasonal one. And that means it can be fixed.
If you liked this blog post, make sure to head over to our podcast and listen to the full episode!
Episode 17 | You Made Good Money Last Year, So Why Does Debt Keep Winning?
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